Understand
by KimoraRyuu
Summary: You…you killed him…” the pinkhaired youth choked out, eyes wide. “Put your shirt back on and let’s go.” Was all Yuki replied quietly before turning and walking from the scene...


_Welcome to my first Gravitation fanfic! I'm gonna have fun with this… Well, for once I actually have a plot. Matter of fact, I already have half of this written, so updating shouldn't take too long. Now I know I should be working on all my other stories, but I didn't want to let this idea slip and before I knew it, I had already written out so much. I just had to post it. Besides, yaoi comes before all, ne? Which reminds me, I need to get the next chapter of Roses & Feathers up…_

_**Edit:** Sorry if my first draft confused some. Thanks to a review I received, I noticed some mistakes that I had made so I thought it would be best to go ahead and fix them now. Once again, I am sorry for any confusion. Also, I hope this new version is some-what better and cleared things up a bit…_

**Disclaimer: _I do not own Gravitation, because if I did, you'd know. It'd have a lot more yaoi in it, not to mention more of Shuichi & Ryuichi's cute costumes and more Kumaguro moments. . What I do own though, is the plot and all songs within this story. I have written the lyrics to each song presented in here and I would greatly appreciate it if you did not try to take them and claim them as your own. I worked hard on them._**

_**Oh, also, I do not own Pocky. Though I do love it and really wish I had some right now…**_

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**You're the first thing to cross my mind, every waking moment…**

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**Even though I know at times I may annoy you, just know I care…**

"Yuuukkkiii, I'm home!" The loud and annoying voice of a young male called out once the door slammed open. The pink-haired owner of the voice bounded in and looked around, pouting slightly when he got no reply.

"Yuki?" he repeated, walking in farther and looking around puzzled.

"Must you be so fucking loud?" a familiar and irritated male finally replied from the back room, walking into the kitchen. He fished a pack of Alpha-menthols from his pocket and stuck a cigarette in his mouth, then searched for his silver lighter.

"Yuki!" the first cried out, running forward and lunging at the blonde with his arms wide open. He quickly met the ground though, Yuki shoving him away.

"What'd I tell you about that, brat?" Yuki muttered coldly, flicking the lighter cap open and the flame jumping to life. He lit the cigarette and slammed the cap shut, shoving the lighter back into his pocket and taking a drag from the lit cigarette.

Shuichi sniffed and tears already began to gather in his eyes. "You're mean!" he whined up at the elder.

"Yeah, I know." He mumbled back, taking another drag then sitting down at his desk, resuming his work on his laptop. He had yet another deadline approaching and his editor wouldn't stop bugging him. Like he would actually be late. He'd been on time every date so far and things wouldn't change anytime soon. At least not when it came to his work.

Trust me, things _had_ changed lately. A lot. Amazing how just one person can change an entire life. And it was _him_ of all people. Hyper, annoying, little pink-haired Shuichi Shindou. Lead singer of Bad Luck, biggest fan of Nittle Grasper's Ryuichi Sakuma, and now lover of romance novelist Eiri Uesagi.

Shuichi jumped up and went over to Yuki, draping his arms over the other from behind. "Yuukii…You promised…" he whined into the elder's ear, pulling him out of his thoughts.

"Don't bother me, brat. I'm busy." Yuki said coldly as he snapped to reality, sticking his cigarette in his mouth, letting it hang, and beginning to type. He ignored the boy even though he remembered his promise last night. The brat had asked to take them both somewhere and he had agreed to go once Shuichi got home. Oh well.

"You're always busy!" Shuichi complained, pulling away and plopping down on the floor by Yuki's chair, arms crossed over his chest and pouting like a five-year-old.

Yuki sighed and took the cigarette out, setting it on an astray by his laptop. He turned around in his seat and looked down at the pink-haired pest with a look of aggravation. "Fine, I'll take a break. What'd you want?"

Shuichi's eyes lit up and he quickly hopped back to his feet. He then grabbed hold of Yuki's arm and began dragging him to the still open door.

"Where are we going?" Yuki demanded, trying to pull away to grab his coat before he was yanked out. He narrowly grabbed it and almost wasn't able to close the door as well as his hyper lover dragged him into the hall. Once they were finally out of the building, Yuki yanked out of the boy's grasp and pulled on his coat.

"Let's go!" Shuichi urged, walking backwards in front of the angered blonde.

"Go where?" he grumbled back, pulling out another cigarette and his lighter.

**You are my reason for living…**

**The reason I breathe…**

Soon after he had lit it and stuck it in his mouth, Shuichi had dragged him to a few back streets and they eventually reached a park. Actually, _the_ park. The one where the two had first met that fateful day. The day when the wind decided to play matchmaker.

Yuki couldn't help but let a slight smile creep onto his lips as he recalled that day. The day he had run across some of the most pathetic lyrics ever written and crushed the heart of the little pink-haired boy that now skipped happily in front of him. They had both come a long way from then. Shuichi's lyric writing greatly improved and Yuki's cold heart finally warmed up, even if it was only a bit.

Said boy grinned and sighed happily, spinning in a circle with his arms out. He stopped with a giggle and stumbled a bit to the side. "Yuki…do you remember it? The first time we met?" he asked, stopping and dropping back on the grass, his sweet gaze locked on the writer.

With a sigh, Yuki flicked his cigarette slightly and sat beside the boy. "Yeah, of course I do." He replied with a slight smile, glancing down at the boy.

"Did you really have to be so mean though?" Shuichi pouted, propping himself up with his elbows.

"I just told you the truth," Yuki stated, taking another puff. "Zero talent."

Shuichi frowned a bit then suddenly lunged on the other man, shoving him onto his back and strattling him partly. "Zero talent huh? So you're saying I'm not good at anything."

Yuki tossed his cigarette away then yanked the youth down to him, crushing their lips together. The sudden act caused a dark blush to cover the boy's cheeks and he was both flustered and out of breath once they pulled away. "I ain't saying that. You're good at something."

Shuichi smiled and moved so he was now completely strattling Yuki. "Am I now?" he teased, running a hand down along the writer's shirt buttons.

"Why else would I keep you around, moron?" Yuki shot back. He then smirked slightly and went to pull the boy back down for another kiss when his phone rang loudly. He half-groaned and half-growled and yanked it out of his pocket. "What'd you want?"

"I guess you forgot about something," His editor started. "Your signing?"

"Ah shit…" Yuki responded. He sighed and sat up, pushing Shuichi off him. "Fine, I'm on my way." He said once standing, then shut the phone and shoved it back in his pocket.

"What's wrong Yuki?" Shuichi asked, cocking his head to the side in puzzlement.

"My editor's complaining about me missing my book signing. I gotta get over there." He replied, yanking the boy to his feet.

**You are my everything…**

Shuichi whined. "But Yuukii…"

"You're gonna have to wait until tonight, brat." The blonde replied, even though he wished to continue as well. He was already going through hell since this was their third day. It'd be worth it later though. He pulled out some money from his pocket and gave it to the youth. "Go buy yourself something on the way home and wait for me. I'll finish as soon as I can." He said before turning and walking away.

Shuichi sighed in disappointment, then shoved the money in his leather pockets, skipping off towards the store near Yuki's apartment. He went in, quickly bought as much Pocky as he could with the given money, then left with a strawberry covered stick hanging out off his mouth, the rest of the boxes cradled in his arms.

He hummed along to Rage Beat while walking, slowly eating the stick in his mouth, all the while anticipating what would happen once Yuki got home. He was so caught up in all of his pocky, humming, and Yuki happiness, that he didn't even notice he was being followed.

It wasn't until he not only found himself lost from not paying attention and cornered that his eyes finally widened in realization. The pocky all fell from his arms and the stick from his mouth as he was grabbed by the arm roughly, then yanked into a crushing kiss. The boy struggled to pull away but just ended up pinned to the ground along the path with his attacker above him. As Shuichi opened his mouth to yell or scream, it was quickly covered.

"You call for help or try to run from me and your boyfriend will pay. One wrong move or you do something to piss me off, and I have my boys rip your precious Yuki apart." The gruff voice of the attacker sneered, and Shuichi knew by both his voice and the look in the man's eyes that it was more than a bluff to threaten him. He was serious.

The singer cowered a bit and let out a soft whine. "No…please don't hurt Yuki!"

The attacker grinned and moved closer, his hand already slipping up the pink-haired male's shirt. "Good, you seem to understand then. Then we should have no problems."

Shuichi couldn't help but shudder at the touch and his eyes closed in disgust, mostly towards himself. His mind shouted at him to run, to scream or get some kind of help. But he couldn't listen. His Yuki was more precious to him then that. It went to prove he really loved the cold-hearted writer and would do anything for him.

Before he knew it, his shirt had been somehow removed while he was in his thoughts. The elder man was already exploring the newly exposed skin and greedily licking at it, causing the boy's own body to betray him in small whimpers and shudders.

He shut his eyes tighter and tears began rolling down his cheeks, his palms beginning to bleed from his nails cutting into them as he clenched his fists. His mind cried out for him to do something, but he couldn't for the sake of that damned author he cared for so much. So much that'd he let this happen just for Yuki's safety…again.

**Just keep me with you, in any way…**

"That's it. I'm done." Yuki told his editor and the rest of the people in line coldly, shoving his seat back and standing.

"But you just got here!" his editor loudly protested.

Yuki just shoved a signed book forward then left. He slipped on his coat while walking out of the door and quickly began searching for a cigarette. There was nothing that stressed him more than his damn over-ecstatic fangirls. They just drove him nuts.

After a few tries with the lighter flame, the cigarette finally lit and he began to somewhat relax. What really had him stressed was not his fans, but the fact that that damn brat had fallen asleep on the couch the past few nights, leaving him to just go straight to bed alone each night. Where's the fun in that?

With a sigh, he took a long drag from the cigarette and began making his way home on the back streets through the park from earlier. He began hoping that the brat was still awake when he got home so he could teach him not to tease him like this, though he highly doubted Shuichi evens knows what he does to him at times.

A ringing came from his pocket and he answered the phone, his tone clearly irritated. And to make it worse, it was his annoying kid brother.

"Hey Aniki! Where ya at?" Tatsuha called loudly from the other line, the sound of music and talking in the back ground.

"What do you want?" he asked coldly, wincing slightly at the blaring noise.

"You and Shuichi doing anything tonight?"

"Maybe."

"Well, if you ain't too busy, a new club opened up downtown."

"I don't do clubs. Too loud, not to mention overflowing with drunks." Yuki replied coolly, showing not even a hint of interest.

"Well, drop by sometime tonight. Just tell'em you're friend with Ryu baby. They all love him here." And at that, Yuki shut the phone and shoved it away. He had plans tonight already, so why waste time with some damn club?

Wanting to buy time so Shuichi wouldn't wonder too much how he left so quick, Yuki began taking the long secluded back paths of the park they had been at earlier. After making his way through a few, he sat on the bench along the side of one and pulled his phone out. He dialed his home number and called to see what Shuichi was doing. He could only trust the brat in his house for so long.

After letting it ring till the machine picked up, he hung up and began to call someone else, figuring that if he wasn't home yet that he must have stopped by a friend's house.

"Hello?" the familiar voice of Bad Luck's guitarist picked up.

"Is the kid over there?" Yuki asked, masking all hints of worry in his voice.

"What kid? Wait—Yuki? If you're looking for Shuichi, he isn't here. What, did you two get into another fight?" Hiro called back, a bit confused at first.

"It's nothing. He probably just got lost on the way back." Yuki said before hanging up and shoving the phone away. He stood from the bench and went off walking again, taking a puff from his cigarette every few seconds. _'Damn kid, where is he?'_

As he neared the end path through the park, a familiar-sounding cry reached his ears, not to mention it had called my name. He tossed the cigarette aside, hastened his pace, and went forward to investigate. He just hoped his assumption wasn't right.

**I want to stay, no matter what you say…**

"Y-Yuki…" was all Shuichi could manage to whine. He didn't bother struggling because he knew the man was much stronger than him. Plus, if he got loose, the man would go after Yuki like he threatened.

"Relax; I'll _try_ to be gentle." His attacker sneered while sliding his hands along the boy's now-shirtless chest, drawing out a small whimper. A cruel laugh rang from his throat as he leaned down to capture the young male's lips again, his other hand sliding down lower.

"Get the **fuck** away from him." A cold voice suddenly growled from not far behind them, pure hatred coating his words.

Instantly, Shuichi's eyes lit up with hope. _'Yuki!'_

The vocalist's attacker lifted his head and glanced back with a glare. "Who the hell are you?" he demanded.

Without a word, Yuki moved forward quickly and slammed his leg into the other man's side, tossing him off Shuichi. He then pulled the boy to his feet and began to approach the man again.

"You **bastard.**" Yuki snarled, pulling the man up to his feet by yanking on a handful of hair and glaring at him. "No one, and I mean **no one**, touches my brat except me." He hissed lowly before punching the man in the face and letting go for him to stagger backward.

Blood dripped from the man's nose and he held it, cursing in pain. He then looked up with a glare and fumbled in a pocket, pulling out a gun and aiming it at the blonde.

Yuki's eyes narrowed at the weapon but he took his chance, moving forward quick enough so a bullet shot only into his left arm before he grabbed the gun in an attempt to yank it away. That caused the trigger to be pulled a few extra times.

Shuichi's eyes were wide the whole time and he was shaking badly. After a moment, he dropped to his knees and slowly grabbed his shirt, clutching it against his chest. He couldn't help gathering up his pocky as well, then scurrying backward to cower in the shadows.

**I'm sure you don't love me, but just give me a chance…**

The fight last about twenty minutes, six gun shots, and many punches. At the end, Yuki stood over the bloody and lifeless form of the attacker with many wounds. He had two gunshot wounds in his left shoulder, one in his stomach, then one in his right leg, along with a trail of blood dripping from his mouth down his chin.

Shuichi shakily crawled from the shadows near a tree, sitting a few feet away from his blood-soaked lover. "You…you killed him…" the pink-haired youth choked out, eyes wide.

"Put your shirt back on and let's go." Was all Yuki replied quietly before turning and walking from the scene, limping slightly from the wound on his leg, one hand pressing on the shots on his shoulder. He had to get away from the scene. It just caused every past memory of the whole Kitazawa incident to flood back.

Shuichi stood slowly and pulled his shirt back on. He shoved the pocky boxes into his pockets the best he could then hesitantly followed the writer. He quickened his pace and caught up to Yuki's side. "Y-Yuki? What do we do now…?"

Slowly, the novelist turned his head to the side and looked into the boy's fear-filled amethyst eyes, his own hazed and distant. "There is no we… I have to leave. Shuichi, go away and never return to me." He told the other coldly, his tone like ice. Without another word, he just shoved his blood covered hands into his pockets and walked away, leaving the singer behind.

Of course it pained him as well. Though he would never probably admit it, he had grown fond of the kid. Maybe even to a point of loving him. But he just knew things would never be the same between them, whether it was Shuichi or himself that was the one to change. To spare them both any extra pain, they couldn't be together. At least, that's how it looked to Yuki at the moment.

**Let me show you the ways of romance…**

Shuichi froze at the words that left his love's mouth and stayed in place, watching as the man of his dreams, the love of his life, left him behind for good. Tears instantly began to pour and he dropped to his knees, silently crying as the cruel novelist he had grown to love walked out of his sight, and out of his life.

"How can I leave you, when I love you so?" Shuichi whispered before letting out a sob, a sharp pain cutting through his chest as though his heart had shattered. His eyes never left where his lover's form had faded to and he was determined to stay in that spot until he either died or his Yuki returned to him, eagerly accepted either one.


End file.
